Thursday, July 8, 2010

Craigslist Ad - Jobs - A Career in Entertainment

Are you a male between the ages of 18 and 24? Are you hot? Can you pull off the “bad boy” look? What about the “sensitive” type? Can you carry a tune, or at least do so with the help of Auto-Tune? Can you dance? Want to make a lot of money and have women around the world screaming fanatically at your presence?

Budding impresario looking for five young, attractive men to start a pop singing group. Boy bands have been big money makers in the past. Since the Jonas Brothers have taken a hiatus, we are currently in a lull. The market is ripe for a young male vocal group to take the world by storm, making millions off impressionable tweeners, young teen girls, and undersexed wives.

I will be holding tryouts next Saturday at 3:00 PM a location to be determined. After the five singers and two alternates are selected, we will begin a three-week intensive training program in my house. Training will consist of vigorous exercise, singing practice, dance classes, personality training, massage, nude wrestling, and other activities I deem necessary. All of the training will be administered by me.

Upon completion of training, we will film some youtube videos and begin an intensive internet viral marketing campaign. We will also start touring, performing impromptu concerts at shopping malls throughout Oregon and Washington.

Once your popularity starts to climb, I will leak to the internet some nude photos of you that I will take. This should provide us a lot of publicity and increase record sales. Tours of Europe and Japan will surely be in the offing after that.

What do you say? Fame and fortune are just an email away.

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